Chapter 8

I died, but my soul lingered in the courtyard.

My body rested quietly beneath the tree.

My delicate, pale face, with frozen tears like beads of ice at the corners of my eyes.

What was I thinking in my final moments?

It was probably during my freshman year of college.

It was the eve of my nineteenth birthday.

Alex had secretly taken a day off from school, coming a day early to surprise me for my birthday.

When I saw him at the campus gates, he was wearing a white sweater and black casual pants, his hair casually falling across his forehead.

Those normally aloof, distinguished eyes, when they saw me, would curve slightly, softening with a hint of a smile.

I screamed and ran to him, jumping into his arms and covering his face with kisses.

“Alex, my big brother, what are you doing here?”

His handsome face flushed slightly. He carried me toward a secluded corner. “So many people around, you’re shameless.”

“What’s there to be afraid of? You’re my boyfriend.”

I held him tightly, as if I was embracing the whole world.

At that moment, I innocently believed I was the happiest person alive.

That day, we walked through the city’s streets and alleys, watching the myriad of lights.

We shared tender, lingering kisses as fireworks exploded in the sky.

That night, I, blushing, secretly slipped into his bed.

I knew what he wanted.

But he was always afraid of hurting me, always holding back.

That night, Alex kissed me with almost sacred devotion, each kiss a potent poison.

“Clara, I’ll be responsible for you.”

“Next year, when you turn twenty, we’ll get married.”

That night, the moon was bright and the stars shone.

The boy’s face, in my eyes, drifted closer and further away.

The night was gentle, and his eyes were like the vast summer sky.

Full of tiny stars, and all of them were me.