Chapter 1

Everyone at school knew I was Jax Anderson’s biggest admirer.

I’d bring him breakfast, take notes for him. Once, when he sprained his ankle playing basketball, I even knelt down to tie his shoelaces.

Until that day on the rooftop, when I heard him say:

“Lily Hayes? She’s clingy as hell, impossible to shake off.”

“When it’s time to apply for college, I’ll tell her I’m applying to A College. She’ll definitely enthusiastically follow suit.”

“Then, Serena Chen and I can just go to C College.”

His friend asked, “You’re just going to keep leading her on?”

He sighed, “What else can I do? She’s a sheltered little flower, I’m afraid she can’t handle the shock.”

But later, he cried and told me, “You used to love clinging to me so much…”

0

I came to bring Jax breakfast, but I froze on the stairwell.

Lately, Jax had been pushing me to tutor him, saying he wanted to apply to A College. Turns out, it was just a lie to get rid of me.

One of his friends pressed him, curious:

“What if Lily doesn’t apply to A College?”

Jax scoffed, casually shrugging:

“Then she definitely won’t go to C College. She hates the cold, she’d never go up North.”

“Besides, as long as I want to go to A College, she’ll go. I know her too well.”

“Since we were kids, she’s always insisted on going to the same school, the same class as me, terrified of being far from me.”

The whole group laughed.

Someone nudged Jax, winking: “Jax, seriously, who doesn’t see how Lily feels about you? I bet if you go to C College this time, she’ll end up crying and begging to transfer.”

Jax sighed, “She’s a sheltered little flower, she’s never faced any real setbacks. Keep your traps shut, okay? I want a few more quiet days before the college application results come out.”

Another friend asked curiously, “So, when are you planning to tell Serena how you feel, Jax?”

Jax’s lips curved into an unconscious smile: “She said she’d agree to be my girlfriend if I get into C College.”

Another friend couldn’t help but exclaim, “Wow, how romantic! Studying so hard for the school's beauty queen?”

Jax laughed, “It’s youth, you gotta be crazy for love at least once.”

…

I don't know how long I stood there.

My ears buzzed, and my heart ached so bad I could barely breathe.

I couldn’t bear to listen anymore, so I dragged my heavy feet away.

On the way back to class, Jax’s words kept replaying in my mind.

It made me think of when I was ten.

A girl in our class told me, “Jax wants me to secretly tell you he’ll be waiting for you at our old spot after school. He has something important to tell you, and you have to go alone. He said it’s a big surprise, so don’t tell anyone!”

I went, full of expectation.

I waited there like an idiot for a long, long time.

Jax never showed up, not until it got dark and started to rain.

I was so cold and scared of the dark. In the end, I just ran home crying.

Later, that girl mocked me in class, “See? She thought Jax only played with her. So easy to fool!”

Jax got really angry at a girl for the first time then.

He promised me, seriously and solemnly, “Lily, I’ll never lie to you like that again. I’ll always keep my promises. If it’s really something important, I’ll tell you to your face.”

But now, it seemed like that promise didn't mean anything anymore.

If he liked someone else, he could have just told me directly.

I wasn’t that fragile.

Why did he have to lie to me like this?

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