My fiance locked me in a freezer, and I backhanded detonated 200 million frozen semen.

As the Quality Control Supervisor for an import company, before the upcoming long weekend, I had to finalize the inventory of our last shipment of king crab.

The moment I stepped into the minus-eighteen-degree freezer, the heavy door slammed shut behind me. The alarm system went dead.

Realizing the temperature was dropping, I immediately grabbed the emergency warm packs from my kit.

But as I peeled one open and pressed it to my skin, a bone-chilling cold immediately told me something was wrong.