Eight Packs of Lies

It was April Fools' Day when a delivery guy knocked on my door asking me to sign for a package.

I waved him off. "I didn't order any pads. My period just ended two days ago. Is this some kind of April Fools' joke, or did you get the wrong address?"

The guy kept his head down, checking his phone.

"No mistake. This address is correct. The recipient is listed as Mrs. Archer --- left by a Mr. Damien Archer."

A few minutes later, my husband's assistant came rushing over, drenched in sweat, bowing over and over.